JONGSON PARK

Speaking of words and actions, here’s another diagnosis. Speaking out your dreams, visions, big or small, convincing someone this is who you want to become, who you will become, because earnings someone’s else’s trust is enough. They’re belief in you is like a drug that can get you through another day of doubt, insecurity and confusion. But you have no idea how you’re going to deliver, how you’re going to do what you say. But it’s comforting knowing someone might see you that way but the comfort breeds complacency.

Stop talking. Don’t speak out your dreams and visions to others. Don’t share it with anyone else. Most of the times they won’t believe you. They’ll think you’re foolish. They’ll judge you, mock you, talk behind your back. They think you can’t do it. But most of the times they’re jealous. Your dreams make them feel insecure, afraid for you, afraid of you, afraid for themselves.

But that’s not the reason why. Keep your dreams to yourself, keep it locked up inside, create a pent up energy, it will be your fuel, it will be your engine. Keep it locked up inside so that it has no where else to go but come out of you, into reality. Because dreams and visions are like a small flame and when you say it out loud, the flame goes out. You have to keep the small flame going for a long time, protect it, grow it, sustain it, build it into a bigger flame, bigger fire, until it’s an inferno. That inferno is the fuel for your dream. When it becomes so hot, so powerful no matter what others think, even no matter what you think, the dream is compelled into reality.

But be careful, watchful, vigilant, real dreams are ways in which we bring a miracle into the world, that is a point of connection and love into reality. Real dreams do not cause destruction, disconnect, condemnation, judgment, separation, rejection.

Announcing your intentions as if it’s just as meaningful as the action. Haven’t you heard “actions speak louder than words”. How many times do you ask yourself, ‘how many times have I carried through what I said I would do?’, if not frequently, then ‘do I really mean what I say?’ Then what compels me to even say those things? And who am I trying to fool? Because you’re no longer fooling the people around you. But that’s it isn’t it? Saying it aloud for a moment, lets you off the hook from actually following through. Just as long as you think other people know what you want to do and give you credit for your intention. And that’s enough, as if the intention is just as valuable as the action. But if you’re being honest with yourself, it’s simply a selfish act, in order to relieve you’re own guilt for not doing what you know you should do.

Intentions are as fruitless as a seed that never sprouts – the action is giving it water, soil and nourishment.

Does pride get in the way of asking for help? Cause we think we don’t need it or we don’t deserve it? If we’re thinking about asking for help, doesn’t that kind of mean we’re in some position of needing it. And “deserving” help seems to go against the point of helping someone. But what if we feel like we’re entitled to help or that someone should be obligated to give help. That seems like an unhealthy perspective too, that might breed resentment, bitterness, a lack of empowerment of your decisions and actions a state of inaction waiting for someone to lend you a hand.

Both seem to be unideal attitudes. But both seem to be interacting with some form of the Ego in dealing with the unequal positions of power, one needing help from someone with the means to give it. Maybe that’s really the issue, getting or needing help is like a form of judgment, needing help is like admitting you’re not good enough, you failed or made mistakes. So the Ego’s logic system, one system says not taking the help or resisting it is not admitting you failed. The other system is if believing you’re entitled to help or somehow it’s a right to be given help, it’s a way to put the judgment on the person that is in the position of giving the help. Both are positions of pride and the Ego at play, and both don’t seem very helpful reconciling within and without.

I think the only expectation and requirement you can control is yourself. It’s futile to hold your breath until someone might do what you want them to do. Ask for help if you need it, don’t expect them to help if they don’t. So help is a miracle if we can get it. Receive it with gratitude and humility. But use the help so that one day you can be in a position to give the help you once received.