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Money can’t buy me love
When people talk about other people… “They’re so rich, they have millions of dollars…” what are they complaining about? or how can their life be so hard?
This is so contradictory to me.
This comment seems to imply that money solves all our problems. But I’m assuming no one would ever agree with that. Or maybe people just don’t want to hear about rich people’s “everyday” problems.
But I think my point is, money doesn’t solve personal problems, and I think most everyone would agree with that. Yes, money solves livability issues like food and shelter. But money doesn’t solve issues with fear, anger, jealousy, insecurity, bitterness, resentment, in fact it mostly likely exacerbates it.
So the fact that someone without money thinks money might help those issues go away or somehow it’s easier to have awareness, manage and overcome those issues with money, really doesn’t know what’s at the root of those issues and how to overcome them at all.
In fact, it means we’re all the same with or without money. We’re all suffering from the same issues of fear, insecurity, anger, jealousy, resentment… Maybe money seems to give the appearance of letting people get away with all those issues with glamorous extravagance, but I think we’re getting away with it in our own way, rich or poor.
Dismissing someone’s problem just because they have money, seems to imply the opposite and maybe takes us off the hook of having compassion and understanding even for the “rich”. But we’re all just the same.
Love for all.
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Money, money, money
Money is complicated. So much psychological, social, emotional, physical, intellectual baggage that comes with it.
If I chase after it, does that make me greedy.
If I have more than others, will I think I’m worth more.
If I don’t have enough, do I think I’m worth less.
If I don’t feel like I deserve it, do I think I’m worthless.When I began to think about these beliefs, all these things I was afraid of being. Even without having money, I was giving money way more power and meaning than it should. In my beliefs, money gives worth and power and less money equals less value and worth.
This belief system only offers two states of being, with money or without money, with power or without value. So even in my state of not having money, I was buying into this belief state about myself. I must have less value, while people with more money have more value. That is, it’s more obvious that people in the positive state, of having money would be holding and pursuing this belief system, but even in the negative state, I was pushing this belief system.
Money doesn’t have a soul. It doesn’t have an intrinsic value to make someone more valuable than another. Although it does enable some people to believe that. I guess that’s what I was rejecting, not the money itself, but that belief system. And having money or wanting money would be conforming to that belief system. To the point I would under value my contribution or self-worth, because money was so important, intrinsic and gave worth and identity.
But this belief system about money, with power or without value, is not the only two states of being. It tries to make us believe that, because people want to maintain a power system. And the people that want power want to keep that hierarchal system.
We can buy into that or realize that money is just a symbol of an exchange. An exchange of touch points between people. When we’re able to connect with people in a way that brings people what they need or want and vice versa. An exchange of thoughts, ideas, creativity, experience, knowledge in the form of service, products or art.
That is when money is merely a token of our exchange, touch points between people.
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Happy Elusive
Be happy with yourself.
Happiness isn’t needing other people to be be happy for you.
Happiness isn’t wanting to be accepted.Happiness is being happy even when nobody is happy for you.
Happiness is accepting yourself.Happiness isn’t finally being happy because the “world” finally cares.
Happiness isn’t about making other people understand.Happiness is being happy first, with yourself, alone in your happiness. True happiness is sharable, spreadable, connectable.
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Fairly Unfair
Maybe it’s equally fair that everyone’s life is unequally unfair.
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The road less travelled
Growing up, my group of friends, we all had our fair share of struggles. Difficulties. Parents. Friends. We didn’t know how to support each other. Share. Verbalize. Encourage. We did the best we could with what we had. My parents, they just came from Korea. They didn’t know what they didn’t know. They did their best with what they knew. I’ve grown to accept, embrace and even be proud of them for that. But that kind of perspective is definitely hard to have, while you’re going through it and just trying to make sense of why things are so “unfair”. Why everything has to be a struggle. Why the world seems like it’s not on your side.
In those depths, when you just want to be understood, someone to have compassion or just even acknowledge what you’re going through. It just seems like there’s not enough compassion or understanding or at least in way that’s satisfying or can be said to relieve you of all the burden.
We all had our own difficulties, trying to make sense of the world. Trying to find our place. Trying to find our voice. Trying to find acceptance and understanding. How can two drowning swimmers save each other? But the path of difficulty, resentment, loneliness, victimization is a path that ends in grace, love and compassion. And what others couldn’t be for you, you can be for others because that path is difficult, painful and lonely and not everyone wants to go down it.
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A word of advice
Good advice, real good advice. The kind of advice that pierces straight to the heart. The kind of advice that rings so true, empirically, intrinsically. The kind of advice that seems outside your realm of natural thought, you would have never thought of, you couldn’t see for yourself, but you intuitively know is right, even though you might not see it as clearly as they can. The kind of advice that is not only sound, essential, wise and insightful but the kind of advice that speaks to you, touches you, is spoken in a soulful whisper of openness, honesty and humility. The kind of advice that is more of a transfer of humanity from one person to another, that delivers energy, inspiration, encouragement, challenge, direction, compassion, understanding, enlightenment at exactly the right time and place. The kind of advice that you will remember for the rest of your life.
That kind of advice is like magic, it’s the rarest and most precious thing in this world. If you’ve ever received that kind of advice, be blessed. If you’ve ever had the privilege of ever sharing one, it’s a gift, thank you for all you’ve done and had to go through to reach the compassion and enlightenment to have done so.
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The Gift of Perseverance
Everyone is in a different circumstance. Environment. Financial. Social. Family. Everyone has a different struggle. Forces that try to make them give up, feel hopeless, let the struggle win.
But struggles are meant to be overcome. No matter how different, no matter how unfair, no matter how impossible. And wether or not we “win” or “lose”, it is the pursuit, fueling the hope and inspiration, never giving up. Because even if we “lose”, in the pursuit of perseverance we discover our gift.